Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Quinn reviews Twilight...for realsies

Over the years, I have managed to avoid seeing movies or reading books that -- despite their enormous popularity -- I have found to be ridiculous, silly, or ridiculously silly on some level. A notable example of this is that I managed to avoid seeing Titanic for about 7 years, before I finally gave in and watched it on television when there was nothing (and boy...do I mean NOTHING) else on.

For me, Harry Potter and Twilight both fit into this category. I've never read any of these books and have no intention of doing so. I have taken Laura to see the Harry Potter movies, but I consider this one of those compromises needed to maintain a happy marriage and not an endorsement of the Harry Potter franchise. I put my foot down on Twilight and made Lauralee see the movie with someone else.

Still, there we were at Wal-Mart the day Twilight came out on DVD, and there Lauralee was that very night watching the movie. I sat down on the couch and thought I'd give it a try.

In the history of mankind, there have been many innovations in the area of torture. These include:

Chinese Water Torture


Thumbscrews



And the Iron Maiden


Twilight wasn't quite that bad. It was more like a Chinese finger cuffs. Or a joy buzzer.





Quinn

4 comments:

Sarah F said...

Or like having a fuzzy pipe cleaner slowly inserted up your nose.

That's just a guess. I've never read or watched "Twilight." I'm too busy with anything by Stan or Jan Berenstain.

bjohnston said...

Allen *tried* reading the Twilight books to understand what all the females were on about, and he is happy to act out his version of it if you ever are free for an evening. It involves describing Edward's marbled, twinkling good looks and cool skin every few seconds.

M2QC said...

Ha ha! I have to admit that I loved the books and hated the movie. My simile? It was like having a vise on your head that got ever tighter throughout the movie to the point of pain toward the end. I think they missed the boat big time. I'm sure I will be seeing New Moon this fall though - a new director gives me hope!

Jill said...

I read three of the four books and enjoyed them while I was reading them but can't seem to make myself pick up the fourth one now. I did NOT like the movie. Edward = ick. He was much cuter in my imagination. I'm proud of you for trying though -- I'm not sure there is ANY way I could convince Jason to sit and watch that one.